Is your Business Robbing you of Love?

I was in a conversation today with my personal clothing stylist (yes, I have one). Her name is Mary, and I was sharing with her all the things that make my relationship great. There are many things, and my wife is amazing. But it wasn’t the communication, regular date nights, or the way we raise our son, Teddy. She was most impressed with when I admitted my imperfections. The ability and courage to share where you are not great gives the listener permission to come to grips with their own humanity. So, I decided to share my recent “fail” when it comes to my relationship with my wife, as it pertains to my entrepreneurship.

You see, I am just like you. I love my life, I love my family, and I love what I do. But sometimes, not all three things are in alignment at one time. But don’t worry, what I am about to share is a demonstration that you can have it all.

This story begins last week — it was the night before my wife’s birthday. She and my son were already fast asleep, it was just me awake in a very quiet house. I was sitting there stunned. Why? Because who I am normally when it comes to birthday’s and other celebrations, is the guy that goes OVER THE TOP. I ensure every detail is accounted for, that every emotion is created and that my wife feels totally loved and cared for from the moment she wakes on her birthday, till the moment she goes to sleep. I lavish her with gifts, I make her breakfast, I have flowers for her, and I plan a day she will never forget, down to the smallest detail. But, here is why I was in shock this particular night: I had planned nothing, I had gotten her no flowers, no gift, and not even a card. NOTHING. Some of you might be thinking at this point: “what a jerk, why are you so uncaring?” My answer, “I have no defense.” You see, there had been this numbness building these past few weeks that led to this moment.

Here is the part you may understand. I had become an obsessed entrepreneur! John and I have been creating this amazing Facebook Marketing product, and there are so many details that go into creating and marketing it. And, I have been having so much fun creating it. But, it has been a juggling act, and because I have been so obsessed and passionate about creating it, I started to develop “blinders” to everything else in my life. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I suppose I thought, “If I give too much attention to my wife, and it gets really juicy and good, it will take me off course and I won’t be able to create an amazing program for my tribe.” As if, if my relationship is good, I won’t be able to have a good business life too.

Please get that none of what I am telling you fits in the world of logic, it is just what my mind was unconsciously doing. My blinders had gotten so strong that there had become static and resentment between me and my wife. And because I was so singularly focused, I couldn’t see that I had developed these defenses that were turning me into a real jerk. And, what is worse, I thought that the arguments and tension that ensued were my wife’s fault! Seriously, I am not making this stuff up!

To make matters worse, I had begun waking up in a state of misery. My sleep was suffering and my eating habits during this “tour de force” of entrepreneurial energy were less than nurturing. I had been going to sleep in almost a state of panic, like my heart might give way to attack at any moment, and I am still a relatively young guy, but remember that my mind had begun reacting irrationally.

So, what was the turning point, you may be wondering? It was my wife’s birthday. You see, even though I had been a jerk in my lack of planning for her big day, I did have the foresight to block out the entire day to spend with her and pamper her as much as I could. Even though I woke up numb and feeling miserable, I made her a delicious and healthy breakfast, filled with goodies from our garden. I made her fresh green juice even. And I gave her the card my son and his nanny made for her, although there was no card from me! By this point, I had also created an appointment in the afternoon for a couples massage and decided we would stop in the healthy restaurant next door to the spa for some good eats after our massage. Then, I made reservations at the very best restaurant in the city. While I started the day distracted and wanting to get right down to business, I knew I had to try to stay present to the birthday plan I had wearily created. And, sometime between massage and an incredibly nourishing food experience at dinner that night, it happened. I finally began to thaw and see the beauty in my wife’s eyes, the incredible emotion that came over me when I saw her smile and words poured out of my mouth that hadn’t been there in a while. I told her she looked beautiful. I said it in a way that really “got to her,” in a way that I really meant it. I was breaking away from being numb, and I could finally feel the emotion and love again that I very strongly have for my wife. This “un-thawing” led to a connected, heartfelt and rich conversation and a 3 hour dinner experience that we didn’t want to end.

I was so happy to feel the love again, and my wife had her husband back, and I have been uber presence ever since. The lesson here is about balance. Without yin, yang is useless. And without love and emotion in your life, your business will be dry and unfulfilled. And whether you have a spouse, child, or you give all your love to your friends, don’t forget to schedule that time to do exactly that. It is important that you nourish your soul with the things that make you happy and give you the most joy. Remember why you do the things you do, and why you became an entrepreneur in the first place. It may be because you wanted freedom to do things your way when it comes to business, but I suspect that at least part of you wants to be an entrepreneur so that you can design your whole life in the way you want. And, given that you can create your own schedule, why not play hooky every once in a while and fall in love again!

Much love,

Jeremy

p.s. if you are wondering whether I neglected to give a gift to my wife, don’t worry. I patiently spent over two hours with her in a boutique jewelry store as she tried on at least fifty pairs of earrings. She walked away with two beautiful pairs that made her feel sexy and alive. (my role as a good husband now redeemed ;-D ).

Entrepreneurs who are killing it on Social – Lynan Saperstein

Social Experts is proud to share with you a new segment we will be doing monthly called Social Experts Interviews.

Social Experts goes behind the scenes with Trailblazer and globetrotter Lynan Saperstein as she shares all about how Social Media has helped her transform the way she does business in this global marketplace.

Lynan is the founder of The Big Factor, Game Changing Business Strategy for Spiritually-open Entrepreneurs. Check her out at http://www.thebigfactor.com/

She is also the Co-Founder of the Trailblazers retreat, an amazing Life and Business breakthrough retreat, held in Croatia that will forever change how you view yourself, your business and life. If that sounds good to you, check it out here: http://www.trailblazersretreat.com/

To find out how Social Media has created opportunities for Lynan in growing her business, check out the video interview here!

Get Aligned with your true purpose, quit wasting your time (and life!)

Looking at the title of this blog, you may conjure up thoughts of living on the mountain top with Buddhist monks, chanting and getting connected with your higher calling. And even though that may be more peaceful than your current life, this is not what I am referring to. Let me explain.

This past weekend, John and I got together to shoot some training videos we are doing as a gift to our amazing fans. There is SO MUCH time and energy that goes into writing copy for the scripts, creating a background that is aligned with our message, figuring out what to wear, managing the technical aspects of a video shoot and so on. So, by the time we began shooting, we had about a hundred hours or more of time already invested in the process. Talk about stress!

There were a lot of details to manage, and I was writing scripts until the moment we began shooting the first of three videos in the series. In fact, the third video’s script was choppy at best, and not totally finished. Keep in mind that we had a crew there for one full day only. After that, we were on our own. It wasn’t such a big deal because we own all the equipment needed to do the high end videos. But it makes a huge difference when you have help. If you are intuitive, or even slightly dense, you can still see where this is all going, can’t you?

After we completed shooting the first two training videos, we were so far behind schedule. At 7pm that night, we read the script for video three and decided to do a run through. About 5 minutes into this process, we realized that some major re-writes were necessary to do the video in the way that really expresses who we are and what we want to deliver to our fans. An executive decision had to be made. Did we want to write new copy on the spot and make the hungry crew wait? Or, wrap for the day and shoot the video tomorrow? We chose the latter. We enjoyed some amazing food, celebrated the first two videos being done, and got back to work later that evening.

Needless to say, we were pretty wiped at this point from all the energy that went into producing the first two videos. And keep in mind that there was a lot of work that went into preparing for this all week. Not much got done that night so we hit the hay, with the intention of starting bright and early and knocking it out, so we could move onto other important business.

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So, that next day looked something like this. Had a good breakfast and sat down together to get started. We were tired, but excited to get the videos done. We felt pretty good that we were delivering a product that will make a difference for entrepreneurs that are family-oriented like us. It makes us happy to think that we are improving lives. Does that set the tone for how we felt? Well, fast forward EIGHT HOURS and imagine how we felt when I tell you we had accomplished essentially NOTHING. Well, that ‘s not totally true, we did write several versions of what we wanted to say on the third training video, but nothing was exactly right, or even close. And the mood…it was thick with frustration, confusion, and honestly with resentment. We both resented the fact that the day was slipping away and we wanted to be done so we could focus on something else. We were even starting to resent one another. Why?

I can sum up the “why” with one word: Alignment. No matter how hard we tried we couldn’t create copy that we were aligned with. What it looked like is that I was putting my head down trying to write the script, then often looking up and saying things like, “this isn’t right” or “I hate what we are doing here.” I couldn’t quite express what it was that I wanted to create, I just recognized it wasn’t right. And what was John doing while I expressed that I didn’t like it….he was resenting me! He just wanted to push through and get it done.

Understandably so, as I did too. Something had to happen or we’d say something to each other that was hard to take back. So, I suggested we leave for a short field trip to clear our heads. That field trip turned into about six hours, most of which we were still short with one another. Then something happened. We began talking about what our commitment was, and the difference we wanted to make in the lives of our fans. We discussed the things we have experienced, and our mentors who have really moved us in the past. And like a surge of adrenaline, the words began to flow that expressed our truest alignment and commitments. And, it wasn’t long before we had our script for the third training video. And when we shared it with someone we trust that is the epitome of our perfect customer, she was blown away and inspired. It was a good sign.

The message here is not about how to resolve disagreements among partners, or how to write good copy.

The message here is about alignment and being true to yourself.

It may have cost us a whole day, a day which was very valuable to us in terms of time to get things done. However, getting in alignment is the fastest path towards connecting with your audience and making the most difference. Instead of pushing through and getting it done because we were tired or frustrated, we held tight to getting it done the right away, in a way that makes our souls sing and rejoice. We did it in a way that made us proud to be doing the work that we do, and in a way that will make our families proud of us.

Thanks for taking the time to read this blog, and we hope it will make a difference for you on the path that you are on. Hang in there, and be true to yourself, and know that whatever path you take to that alignment will be perfect!

Much love,

Jeremy

Building Your Social Media Brand Authentically

Today, I am going to talk about building your brand in social media. You want to expose yourself to the universe. You want to let yourself be seen by the people that are following you. Be fearless in sharing yourself and be authentic. Let people know what is important to you.

Watch this video to learn more about building your brand in social, and you get to learn a little more about me.

 

Hope this blog post has been helpful. For even more helpful blog posts/webinars, and education programs, keep in touch with us at on our Facebook page at http://www.fb.com/erocketfuel.

Go Like us today and share yourself authentically with us and our fans.

Entrepreneurs who are killing it on Social – Liz Dialto

Social Experts is proud to share with you a new segment we will be doing monthly called Social Experts Interviews.

Social Experts goes behind the scenes with Liz Dialto as she shares all about how Social Media has helped her transform the way she does business to really connect with her tribe and create lasting relationships.

Liz is a women’s body & soul coach, speaker, and writer. She is the founder of the Soul Movement Salon, a thriving private Facebook community where women come together to have transparent conversations about all things body, mind and soul and the brand new movement experience The 2xONE Method which she teaches live in LA and will be offering online in May 2014.

To find out how Social Media has created opportunities for Liz in growing her business, check out the video interview here!

Stop Using Facebook

This may come as a surprise to many, but I have strict rules about how much time I spend on Facebook and when. And when I am with my family, it is a definite no-no to be on my iPhone pecking away messages to my myriad of great friends that reside there in cyber-space. Why do I have these strict guidelines when it comes to Facebook, a resource that feeds my family’s financial well-being? Because, well, there is a point when Facebook can be destructive.

I was sitting in a very nice restaurant last night with my wife, it was date-night. We put one phone on the table, in case our son’s nanny needs to reach us, but we don’t touch it, we instead focus on each other, and decompressing from our exciting entrepreneurial days. As I begin to relax, I look around the packed restaurant. It was filled with two types of people. The first kind of person was relaxed, enjoying their meal and more importantly, enjoying the people they came with. The second kind of person was the disconnected, glazed-over eyed Facebook addict. At these tables, it was normal for both persons to be doing the same activity, as if they came to this restaurant to “feed” and “be with” others, but couldn’t resist being digitally connected. The characteristic that united each of these addicts, was that they appeared uneasy and weren’t smiling or enjoying their experience.

This gave me pause…

Will Facebook be the cause of a generational Social Disease? Will the next generation be labeled Generation Un-Social? Will families be united only by the mere fact that they live in the same household, but not really even “know” whom they reside with?

I’m not certain about this theory, but it certainly seems like an interesting study to me.

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This exploration into the wall-building psyche of the average human being has led me to wonder, has Facebook done any good in the world?

Let’s take a look from my own experience. I have about 1700+ fans on my personal Facebook Page. They are a mixture of people I know well, people I have met along the way, and people I have shared interests with. They are people I have done work with, they are people I went to school with, and people I have gone to conferences with. Some are even people that have seen me or my wife speak at conferences.

I have been reunited with my best friend from Kindergarten whom I thought I would never talk to again. Then reunited again with my best friend from the 3rd to the 7th grade whom virtually disappeared from my life after my father joined the Army and we moved away. I was reunited with my first love, Erica, from the 9th grade, after there were rumors that she went off the deep end and ran away from home, and maybe even took her own life (all not true). I have been reunited with co-workers from my 4 years in the Air Force, with friends that I went to college with, and I stay in touch with them all. Perhaps the best re-connect was with my business partner and best Friend John Wayne Zimmerman. We were friends in High School when we lived in Stuttgart Germany, kicking up all kinds of trouble as teenagers that were let loose in a foreign country with lots of energy and testosterone. Realizing that we still had a lot in common when it comes to our business aspirations and family commitments, I joined forces with John to help transform his company eRocketFuel, into Social Experts.

Given that I have been reconnected with so many amazing people, I would make the case that Facebook actually HAS done a lot of good.

While we were arriving at our date night restaurant last night, my wife and I ran into an old and dear friend whom we hadn’t seen in over a year. She knew we were about to take a trip to San Diego, and told us that she had been following our every activity on Facebook for the past year. While I believe in the power of human connection, and face to face interaction, the mere fact that friends whom you don’t see for long periods of time are still emotionally connecting with you in the activities you are posting about, is a strong case for the assertion that Facebook might actually have us MORE CONNECTED than in any time in human history.

That is a strong assertion, I know. But think about it, if you consider that we now live in a more nomadic society, where it is not unusual to move from city to city for work, and to make friends from around the world due to your travels, Facebook allows us the opportunity to “peek” into each others lives and communicate through the power of Images and Videos. Grandmothers, and Grandfathers are able to be up to date on every activity of their beloved grandchildren, siblings are able to stay connected and not miss a beat, and with the addition of Facebook Chat and VIdeo, we are able to be “live” in each others living rooms. When in human history have we been able to “visit” virtually at any time day or night, with people from around the world?

It is nothing short of amazing.

Given that there are two sides to every coin, I choose to lean toward toward the notion that Facebook does more good in the world, than it does harm. I believe that human beings will find a way to be connected if they desire, and they will disconnect if they don’t feel like being present with the person that sits across from them. The key to good “Facebooking” is Balance.

As an entrepreneur, your time is valuable. Every hour is worth either money, or piece of mind. Choose wisely how you spend that time-collateral. Your livelihood depends on your ability to think critically about how much time you are willing to invest online, and how much time you need for other matters in your business. Use a Social Media Calendar to plan out your Social Campaigns, schedule out the times you are on social, maybe once in the morning, once in the afternoon for very specific amounts of time. Perhaps catch up with friends and family in your “off hours” after your business time is complete.

Use Facebook Marketing to effectively grow your business, and use Facebook socially to stay connected to those you care about. And if you need help with your Social Branding, don’t forget that Social Experts does Social Consulting to make sure you are aligned with your Social Message and we do Social Media Management for those of you whom are committed to focusing solely on your business and making more money doing what you are good at. Send us a message if you want to set up a quick “social exploration session.”

Much love to everyone, keep rocking in your businesses and enjoying the life you have created as an entrepreneur.

Jeremy DeWeese

Social Marketing Challenge

You know, we are always excited to witness brilliance in our everyday experience. And when you see brilliance, the best thing you can do is “borrow it.” That’s why, when our friend Sarah Jenks created a 28 Day Live More, Weigh Less Challenge, we thought, “Holy Cow, We Love This!” The next thought was, “This would be an amazing way to do to teach entrepreneurs how to do Social Marketing!”

So, we set out to create a Social Marketing Challenge that would not only be educational but fun. Every day there is a new challenge that will give you an action that will forward your game on Social. And, the steps are not so difficult that you can’t do them in ten minutes.

We are currently on Day 8 of the Social Marketing Challenge, so if you haven’t joined in the fun, it is not too late to catch up! And, while we suggest you do all of these challenges to be most effective, you do have the option of doing on the challenges that appeal most to you.

So, join us by going to our Facebook Page at Social Experts and please share as you do each challenge so we know how things are going for you, and can contribute to you when you feel more “challenged” than having fun. Because, in the end, there should be a good balance of both so you can grow your Social Marketing Skills. Hope this is helpful, and as always, we love doing things that make your life easier!

Here are images from the posts we have done so far:

And, don’t forget that our “Thrive and be Home by 5” Webinar is happening  TUESDAY at 1pm/Central. If you haven’t register, do
that here: http://bit.ly/1bwaNao

WHY do you do what you do?

Why. Never before has this simple word held so much meaning. In a world filled with so much information, you might think people would grow weary of wanting to know more and find out the why, but it is much to the contrary.

You see, 20 years ago, people were answering the question of WHAT. What. What do you do? It is simple enough, I sell shoes, I trade stocks, I clean carpets. Anyone that was making a living had an answer to that question, it was easy. And in most cases, there was no reason to define it any further. I show up to work, I work, and I get paid. Period.

But why?

Why do you do what you do?

Have you engaged and grappled with this question? If you are an entrepreneur, and you have not had a good bout with this question, you are yet to feel it’s pain and occasional torment.

Never before has there been so much opportunity to grow and prosper. The world is our Oyster and we have CHOICE. Choice is another one of those juicy words that an enlightened entrepreneur gets to play with on a daily basis. We have the choice to do whatever we would like, and the impact of each choice is uniquely ours.

So, given that we have choice, and we can spend our days however we would like, isn’t it now more important than ever to know why? No? Not to you? Well, if you are a naysayer, I hate to break it to you, but your customers want you to know. They need you to know.

Because the customer also now has unlimited choices about who they hire or buy from, they have the unique right to have higher standards. Gone are the days of buying from the business around the corner, simply because it is close to your home. We now have a thing called the INTERNET. The internet is an innovation that has brought the average consumer to your digital door and made them informed, and they are now demanding. They demand that you make a superior product, that you engage with them in a timely manner on Social, and speaking to the subject of this blog post, they want to know WHY you do what you do, because they can work with anyone, but they WANT to work with someone they believe in.

WHY?

Why do you do what you do? This questions seems innocent enough, but it is the why that will dictate your every move in your business, and on social. It is the WHY that will motivate you to be better. It is the WHY that will create loyal fans that believe in the same things that you do. And, it is the WHY that will have your loyal fans spread your gospel and expand our business.

That is why it is so important that you build a brand on Social Media that defines your beliefs, your values, and shines a light on why you do what you do. And, if you are leading a small team or are a solopreneur, it is important that the consumer gets an authentic glimpse at who you are and what it is like to be you. People love connection, they want to know you, and they want to believe in you. So, give them a glimpse, openly and authentically share yourself. There is nothing to fear, nobody will steal your soul. If anything, this simple act will give you purpose, and it will remind you of why you got into your business in the first place.

Here is to your success, and a life that is fulfilled and thriving.

Do you love your family? How much?

I love my family, not out of obligation, or because I don’t have anyone else to love. I love my family because they contribute to a life that is filled with love, laughter and greatness.

The greatness part comes in because I feel incredibly supported and uplifted by them. I feel like, whatever I do, whether I fail or succeed, I will be loved in return. This freedom drives me. Because I have unconditional love, I try harder than ever to build a life where my family is so well taken care of, not only with material things, but with my time and attention. It is definitely a good life.

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It wasn’t always that way. There was a time when I was driven, not by my love of family, but by my love of success. I was motivated by doing, and getting more. My bank account, and the things in my house were symbols of my success. My time, it was spent in pursuit of things that would support the idea in my head that I was successful. Then, my son Theodore was born a switch flipped. I realized that how I succeeded was up to me. That, I could have it all and be all that I wanted to be for my family. That I could make all the money I needed, have all the things that provided a great life for my family, and give my time freely, the way I wanted to, to my family. So, I set out to create a life like this and I have succeeded. It is success measured by my own happiness, and I love it.

My business partner, John Wayne has created the same in his life as well with his two girls Lucy and Eliza. They are little princesses and they light up his world. John even finds time to do triathlons and is more fit than ever. This is all a product of how we have structured our business and lives to have it all.
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Because we have it all, we want to give back to those we love, our fans and customers. For you, we created a three part video training series that will help you take control of your business through Facebook Marketing, and do it all with time to spare, so you can be home in time for take-out with your family.In this series, we will help you lay the groundwork for true Facebook Marketing success. We will also share with you how to use Facebook Apps to build your list, so you can market to them on Facebook, and outside of Facebook. We will also cover how to create a kick-ass brand presence, how to use Facebook Insights to make more money, and how to maximize your use of Facebook Ads to generate more business.

There is about forty minutes of free training in these videos. Take the time to watch them, and bypass any mistakes you might make if you try to figure it out on your own. You will begin a journey of finding more time to spend with those you love, and do the things you are passionate about.

Our commitment is that you have access to all the tools you need to live a life you love. Thank you for allowing us to share with you in this small way. Please let us know if these videos are helpful, and other ways we might help you navigate Social Media Marketing.Much love,

Jeremy

To access the Facebook Marketing Training Videos, click here:  http://fbme.wearesocialexperts.com/video-series/

Are you professional enough?

You know, we get asked a lot, “Do I need to hire a professional photographer or videographer to do my images and videos that I use on Social Media?”
The short answer is yes and no.

If you are an entrepreneur that is on a mission to succeed in your business, it is imperative that at some point, you get some professional images done of you and/or your product. In most cases though, YOU are the face of your brand, so at very least get some professional images made of yourself so you can maintain a professional image.

The same goes with video. There will be some point where you will want to deliver a message that is clear and powerful, and doing it on your smartphone just will not cut it. There are professional videographers who can light and frame you in a way that is incredibly flattering and highly professional. And, there are video editors that can use text and motion graphics in ways that will give your video a more energetic, highly dynamic look. In the end, you want to stand out and getting help from someone that is good at what they do is an imperative part of your growth. What do I mean by that? Well, when you treat yourself like someone who is valuable and professional, and worth it, you will begin to focus on those things that make you money, and hire out the things that you are not great at. And that is when things will click in your business. It is at this point that the stars will align, so will your financial success, because you are focusing on the right things, and not trying to figure out how to use software to edit your videos.

On the flip side of things, you do not always need to use professional images or videos, especially on social. People are so used to streaming imagery and video, that they do not expect perfection. It is in this case that the message is what is most important. If you deliver a great message, your fans will forgive you if you send them a video you shot on your smartphone in the middle of Target. If you just say, “I’m in Target but just thought of something I am excited to share,” they won’t think anything of it. The message here it to communicate and share, deliver your message, and do it often. Stop trying to be perfect, because nobody is perfect, and they will appreciate you being real, and feel more connected to you because of it. Same goes with still images. Next time you are in an exotic location, or doing something fun, share it. People will love to get a sneak peak into your life. It is this authentic sharing that will attract loyal and excited fans.

I’ll end this with a little bit of homework. Sit down with Facebook and look at the people you are most excited to follow. They may be celebrities in your field. Look at how they represent themselves and their brand. Do they use a lot of images and videos? Are they professional or “real” and do they effectively share their lives? Are you attracted to that? If so, replicate what they are doing. It is way easier to follow a proven formula than re-inventing the wheel.

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Click this link: http://fbme.wearesocialexperts.com/video-series/ to take a look at some professional videos we just did for you. We have created a three-part video training series just for you, our fans, so that you can benefit from our mistakes, and from our wisdom when it comes to Facebook Marketing. In this series you will learn how to build a strong foundation on Facebook that builds raving fans, we will also show you how to use apps to build your list of followers, to be used inside and outside of Facebook. Then we will cover how to create a kick-ass brand presence that has you stand out from your competition, and also how to effectively create Facebook Ads that get you paid.

Let us know how you enjoyed the videos by clicking on the Facebook icon below.

Much love,

Jeremy

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